Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Hottest New Nail Art Trends of 2014!

I recently got a super-exclusive sneak preview of what, according to an inside source*, are going to be this year's hottest new trends.  And since I'm so hip and trendy, I just had to try out all these new techniques right away.  You guys, this is seriously cutting edge stuff here.  World premiere.  You get to say you saw it before it was cool.


Les Ongles de Terre
All natural, organic, locally produced artisan terrain provides a sustainable and beautiful eco-friendly manicure. 



Nail File Manicure
Textures were the big trend in 2013, but this new type textured manicure has both form and function. Now, thanks to the geniuses at 3M™, you can file your nails with your nails. Whoa.


Whole Handicure
Take it to the next level and just do your whole hand. Why the hell not? Do it. Who cares. Life is meaningless.


Cherenkov Manicure
The materials for this nail look might be a little hard to get your hands on, but the end result is worth the effort.  Your nails will be so glowy, it's like they're actually lit from within.  The downside is that there may be some side effects, which could include sudden onset of superpowers or severe burns. Probably both.


Quantum Manicure
This one is a more complicated two-step process, but it'll definitely turn heads. First, apply your Cherenkov manicure as usual.  Then, using your new-found powers, turn your nails invisible or teleport them to another location or time period, depending on which powers you got. 

You heard it here first! 


*source is inside my head

65 comments:

  1. I was looking forward to your post after last year's! Nice

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  2. Hahahaha - gorgeous 1 April fool, muck mani - this cracked me up :-D

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  3. Omg these are the best trends since the Doritos chips lacquer collection!

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  4. Doing a handicure right now. I can't wait to be the first in the office to be on top of the trends! Thanks!

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  5. Doing a handicure right now. I can't wait to be the first in the office to be on top of the trends! Thanks!

    (I hope this didn't double post!)

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  6. LOL! I know I want to try the Nail File manicure. It would make back scratches soooo satisfying. ;-)

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  7. This is hilarious, you're too funny! Love this post :D

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  8. I'm loving all the April Fool's posts in the nail blog community, they're always so creative :D

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  9. WOW, love them all! Haha! Nice try. :)

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  10. Hahahahaha <3

    Can't decide - Bio Mani or Quantum and sending my nails to the future???

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  11. this was brilliant. the quantum manicure was super creepy! GAH.

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  12. Happy April Fool's to you too, Scrangie! These are hilarious, the Whole Handicure is my favorite. Thanks for the morning laugh :-)

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  13. you've outdone yourself this year!!! *snicker* the Quantum Mani is the coolest!

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  14. BAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA ��������

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  15. You post not so often these days, so immidiately when I saw Scrangie have an update on 1st of April bells started ringing... I instanly recalled your last year thingy about the extra finger surgery I back then took for real for a second. But it was the last time you fooled me... this year there was no chance! ;)

    Nice try, though!!!

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  16. This is too funny! Made my day for sure.

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  17. Totally got me with the first one. I'm embarrassed for myself.

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  18. Love this! The 3M manicure would also be great for scratching your back!

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  19. This is awesome! I adore your creativity.

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  20. Man that Cherenkov Manicure looks cool. lololol
    Happy April Fool's to you too, Scrangie! :P

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  21. Nice. I was hoping you'd post today. The nihilist mani-- SO avant garde! I'm half tempted to wear that one to work today (or a weaker variation thereof).

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  22. You are the literal best <3 These were all amazing XD

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  23. Hahahahahaha! Thanks for the laugh! :-D

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  24. Wow, this took work! Thanks for the snorful, mam!

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  25. I LOVE your 1st April posts!! :D

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  26. OMG, every year you crack me up with these posts - LOVE!!!

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  27. Hahaha Love this!!!! Happy April Fools Day.

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  28. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Are you implying that our nails live on our hands live in our world where there is reactivity and such? Oh, NO. (Hyper ventilating). Excuse me, (feeling antsy)... I have to go do my nails.

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  29. I'm pretty sure I've seen an actual dirt manicure, and it's really not all that different than when people used actual sand before they made the "sand effect" polishes. The black matte sand effect polishes look to me a lot like traction tape, so I had really considered trying just putting that on my nails once, so I actually think the nail file nails are great!

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  30. I always love your first post in April ;-)

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  31. HAHAHAHA, this had me rolling! Good one! <3

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  32. For some reason, the life is meaningless line elicited a chuckle. Great post.

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  33. I always look forward to your April Fools Day post!

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  34. Whole hand mani. Because life is meaningless. Lol

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  35. Every year I'm looking forward to your April Fools post!!!!! This one does not disappoint Can't wait to try the handicure :-)

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  36. Love it!!! You always outdo yourself, and this one is priceless. I thought the Cherenkov one was especially chic. lol ;)

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  37. OMG, "Les Ongles de Terre" xD Laughed out loud, literally. :D

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  38. Oh Scrangie! you make me LOL every April 1st. That "whole handicure" was me when I first started polishing.

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  39. Good thing I don't like to follow trends.. ;)

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  40. heheheh if it was real. I definitely wouldn't want be on trend :)

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  41. Love a "french" manicure, Happy poisson d'avril !

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  42. Bahahaha. You never fail to crack me up with these. The Whole Handicure especially, just the name is amazing. I will try it immediately.

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  43. LOL! Thank you for the great laugh! I must admit, the 'whole handicure' would make my polishing skills much easier ;)

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  44. Lorde is way ahead of you on the whole handicure

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  45. Freakin' BRILLIANT! The first one, I was like WTF?!?!

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  46. best. April Fools post to date :o)

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  47. Brilliantly funny post! But that last picture creeps me out! :S

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  48. I want to file my nails WITH MY NAILS!! Great post. :-D

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  49. Brilliant! I love your April Fool's posts lol

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  50. This is, by far, the best manicure advice I have ever seen.
    So hoping for the teleportation powers- that'll make getting the kid to school in the mornings sooo much easier!

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  51. We need more articles like this one - I was smiling throughout :D !

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